I do know as Bailey talked about wanting to suck cocks is something I want. I just have the added desire to lick some real pussies as well. It would be nice to be able to let my natural personality traits become stronger and female. I would love to be dressed up and treated as a lady and have my companion hold my hand and us eat a nice dinner and enjoy some entertainment before going home and my total devotion to them being displayed. I have a feeling right now of wanting to cry. I want to know what this is like. To be intimate on these levels. I feel so trapped sometimes because I have to live up to a male standard that stinks. I think that one thing wonderful about women is how they can be strong and be vulnerable as well. I know this is being said in an idealized fashion. The laws and equality is a long way from where they should be for women. I just wish I could be released from this prison of a body.
I am sorry. When I began I did not mean to delve into a pity post. I feel that is all I write anymore. Many of you know what I feel and I hate causing you to think about those thoughts. Sometimes I wish the hypnosis files I had just took me somewhere in my fantasies where I was living as who I see inside. I could buy pretty underwear and have an easier time shaving. Maybe I could do better with weight issues. Depression eating sucks. I am so moody right now. Sorry.
I wish I had someone to play with me tonight. I need to just escape.
Alexia
5 comments:
Hello Lady Alexia,
I don't usually comment back on blogs, I'm more of a lurker with lots of kinky fantasies. I'm commenting because I have many feelings similar to yours and feel trapped in my body and life at times. I just wanted to assure you aren't alone. There are lots of us out there who desire, lust, crave for a different life that we live. I feel like the character Mr. Tanner from the Harry Chapin song where he sings bass, but after trying it in public, now only does it late at night alone, He did not know how well he sang; It just made him whole. I do some things late at night to make myself whole I suppose. So if I can do anything to help you 'feel whole' please let me know (nothing stalker like here). Know there are others alone in their fantasies and dreaming of something else out there just like you and will talk and support you if you want.
Wishing you comfort, joy and dreams coming true this time of year,
Jackie
I know i feel very similar to what you are describing here sometimes as well. I am married and desperately in love with my wife, but sometimes i just want to be vulnerable pampered, adored, and desired.
You sound like a great person. I think when you are comfortable in your own skin others will be comfortable with you as well.
I sympathize with you Alexia, but let me just say, please don't ever feel hesitant to posting whatever you want here, this is your space to fully express yourself try to keep that in mind.
has for everything else I wish I could offer you more but please hang in there, and of course I'm always available for hugs. *hug*
i totally know what you mean and I feel the same way many days. i don't think you are being depressed just voicing the frustation of being force to hid or not fully unleash your feminine side because you are afraid of what society will say. I say fuck society and their expectations. Let yourself out and be who you want to be and the world will love you.
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