Then there is me. I am wanting the same as he, love, affection, and sex. Intimacy is a craving that I want. Yet, I am just alive in this cyber-space prison. Never able to seek comfort as the woman I am. Knowing I am forever denied being the person I should be. I can't live in the world the boi does. We would be destroyed. A lifetime of helping and caring for kids would be disgraced by lies and prejudices. I know that makes me a coward. I am just a shadow hiding from who I am and afraid to become fully in the life of poverty and despair. That hurts as well.
It all equals to my dreams of just fading away. Just letting my body, mind and soul drift into nothingness. That would be better than existing in a lonely place of no love, no touch, no hope. Thing is I am a coward when it comes to anything like that as well. My sense of caring for others stops me from seeking a final end. Besides, it would not be like I fantasize, just melting away. So I linger. The boi who is not loved and the girl who is not loved. Nothing of the most terrible type.
Alexia Rose
4 comments:
Im so sorry for what you are going through. I was there for a long time for similar reasons but dont give up on hope things can change.
Every second of everyday offers us a chance to change and a new way for our world and lives to become something new.
If youd like to talk you van email me ilundrais@gmail.com
I don't know if this is good advice for you but I wonder if small steps towards Alexia would be a better approach. I know you want to wake up one morning fully formed but that can't happen ,I talk generally here but set yourself a goal say seek out a chat room or dating site. There are many people who would love to meet a kind caring sole like you.
one day you well find the person who ticks your boxes and want to meet them. When you meet don't feel you have to go meet them dressed to the nines, they well understand one day you well want them to meet the real you in private. the same with friends and family you do not have to come out to them waving your new boobs in their face. as I say not an overnight fix but with each small step your weight well be lifted.
Hello beautiful girl
I always thought that you're a beautiful person, of beautiful feelings, and very hot, I love that. You enjoy more and worry less, perhaps fears prevent us from doing many things, but you have to find a middle ground, a place where you feel comfortable and can enjoy.
clear that it would be best overcome this fear and be who you want to be, but you can go step by step, see how you feel.
I understand that is easier said than done and ultimately it is you who is living and knows how hard it is. I think the world is not just for boys and girls, they are people, individuals, all different no equal to the other.
I would like to one day read a publication yours as a beautiful girl, hot, do not worry and that his only fear is not pleasure hehe
kisses
Hi.
ive been reading your blot for some time
I csnsi relate to how you feel.
Sometimes wish I could magically change
andmy life ss a girl would be so much better.
the real transition would be just too slow and every one I know would prabably alienate me.
So I too just keep living a double life
Good luck.
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